My last post is, yes, silly, but I really think we have a lot to learn about being happy, following our hearts, living in the moment, and accepting ourselves - from our animal friends.
On my own journey from emotional eating, I started out with a belief that my happiness was wrapped up in my looks. If I met the cultural criteria: thin, young, sexy, I could feel good about myself.
But there was always a catch. Either I wasn't thin enough, or I was thin enough, but knew I couldn't sustain myself on a diet for too much longer. And soon enough, youth would be gone.
Allowing myself to judge and be judged by these criteria meant my happiness and freedom had to endlessly be earned. In the movie biz, they say, "you're only as good as you're last picture." In the diet biz, you're only as good as you're last weigh-in.
Living this way is crazy. And what is it we're actually earning? What I discovered, was that I didn't really like having friends and lovers who would judge me based on my appearance. It was like having an anvil hanging over my head, held in place by a very thin thread.
When I realized it was not my weight that was causing my insecurity (which was there whether I was thin or fat), but my own self-judgment, that's when my life finally began to change.
While it's not easy to shift the painful, negative thoughts and emotions that come with self-judgment, it is possible (and preferential to living under the anvil!).
So take a lesson from your favorite 4-legged friend. You really are lovable, just as you are this minute. You are good enough. You don't have to earn friendship, affection, kindness or respect. You just have to start giving these things to yourself, unconditionally and in abundance. As your self-treatment changes, you will teach others, by example, how to treat you. Those who are too entrenched in their own judgment will fall away. It's okay to let them go. You deserve better.
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